Day 7: No help at all

My number one reason why I think hope is stupid is because it lets you down.  And when it lets you down, it hurts.  Bad.  Really bad.

And that brings me to my number two reason why I think hope is stupid.  In the really bad hurt, hope doesn’t help.  When the hurt is really bad, all you can think about is trying to get the next breath in your body.  And sometimes you don’t really even care about that. 

Maybe some pain can be eased by hoping for better or for different, but when you’re really hurting, hope is out of reach.  It feels like the happy fat of emotions, a luxury for those who have more than enough energy to breathe. 

Hope is not balm in the midst of pain like that. In fact, it almost feels cruel.  And if you’re hurting like that, you’ve probably had enough of cruel for a while.